i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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