he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize