the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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