i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
