She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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