Your mouth is God's brothel.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
And then he peed in my hair
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