The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
