You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize