lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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