I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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