Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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