I hate your face
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
