i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
