There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize