She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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