i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize