Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
