oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm jealous of your bromance
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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