Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
I think I just sharted jello shots
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