I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize