ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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