what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize