Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
