just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
