I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I will be naked everywhere
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
