I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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