There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
