How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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