Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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