clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
