the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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