the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize