Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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