Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
