I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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