??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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