Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize