I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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