sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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