Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I want to be your penis for a week.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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