I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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