I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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