I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
