Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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