NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
