Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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