Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I want a musical about memes.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
