well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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