meet me or not, i'm out of control
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize