my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
